Those Whom You should not Let Your Daughters Marry

Islamic Conditions for Marriage

In this section titled “Islamic Conditions for Marriage,” we will discuss several important points related to choosing a spouse in Islam.
According to divine teachings, children are a sacred trust from Allah — a blessing that must be protected. To safeguard this trust, it is essential to provide them with proper moral and religious upbringing and to select pure and righteous spouses for them.

When a woman marries and moves into her husband’s home, she naturally comes under the influence of her husband, his family, and their environment.
Therefore, the home she enters should be one filled with faith and piety. Her husband should be well-mannered, respectful, and have good character.

For this reason, Islam strictly forbids marrying one’s daughters to men who do not meet Islamic standards of faith and character.
The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said:

“Marriage is a form of obedience. When you marry your daughters to someone, you make her obedient to him.”

Hence, one must be extremely cautious about whom they entrust their daughters to.
It is not lawful to marry them to a man who is irreligious, unjust, or morally corrupt. Similarly, men who are ill-tempered, arrogant, jealous, greedy, or vulgar are also unfit for marriage.

It is also not right or humane to marry your daughters to a foolish or ignorant man who lacks wisdom and cannot manage his affairs, as this will bring hardship upon her.
Likewise, Islam strictly forbids marrying daughters to alcoholics or those who openly disobey Allah’s commands.

The Prophet (peace be upon him) said that a person who marries his noble daughter to an irreligious man will be cursed many times each day. (2)

Husayn ibn Bishar once wrote to Imam Musa al-Kazim (A.S.) saying, “One of my relatives who is bad-tempered has asked to marry my daughter.” The Imam replied:

“Do not marry her to him if he is among the wrongdoers.” (3)

Imam Ja’far al-Sadiq (A.S.) also forbade marrying daughters to ignorant or foolish men who cannot be trusted in social or financial matters, referring to verse 5 of Surah al-Nisa. (4)

The Prophet (peace be upon him) said:

“If anyone who knows that drinking alcohol is forbidden still drinks and then seeks a woman’s hand in marriage, he deserves no response.” (5)

Imam Ali al-Ridha (A.S.) also said:

“Beware of marrying your daughters to those who drink, for giving a virgin to such a man is like offering her for fornication.” (6)

Those who neglect Allah’s commands and lack good morals are prone to sinful behavior. A man without intellect, self-control, or morality cannot be trusted with a believing woman — a divine trust from Allah.
Such unions not only harm the woman but also negatively affect the children. Imam Ja’far al-Sadiq (A.S.) stated long before modern science confirmed it — that immoral behavior leaves traces in one’s offspring. (7)

Do Not Marry Such Women

Just as men with corrupt or immoral behavior are unfit for marriage, Islam also warns against marrying women who lack good character or faith.
The Prophet (peace be upon him) said:

“Avoid marrying foolish women, for living with them will destroy your peace, and their children will become oppressors.” (8)

He also said:

“Avoid marrying a woman who is beautiful but raised in an immoral family.” (9)

The Prophet (peace be upon him) used to pray:

“O Allah, I seek refuge in You from a child who disobeys me, from wealth that brings no benefit, from a wife who causes me distress through her bad behavior, and from a deceitful friend.” (10)

He also said:

“The worst of women are those who are sterile, impure, stubborn, proud of themselves, and disobedient to their husbands.” (11)

Another narration says:

“Three things bring misfortune — a woman, an animal, and a house. A woman’s misfortune is her high dowry and infertility.” (12)

Imam Ali (A.S.) said:

“The worst wife is one who is disobedient and unkind.” (14)

The Prophet (peace be upon him) further said:

“The worst women are those who lack respect for their families, act arrogantly toward their husbands, are malicious, and fail to adorn themselves for their husbands but beautify themselves for others.” (15)

How to Choose a Spouse

The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said:

“Marriage is my Sunnah. Whoever turns away from my Sunnah is not from my nation.” (16)

Marriage in Islam is not just a social contract — it is an act of worship and a foundation for faith, character, and family.

The Evil-Doer is Deprived of Allah’s Mercy

The Prophet (peace be upon him) said:

“Al-Naqis Mal’un” — meaning, “The evil-doer is deprived of Allah’s mercy.”

Here, the term Naqis does not mean someone physically incomplete but one who neglects self-improvement — who neither seeks knowledge nor strives for good deeds.
A person who wastes their life only eating, sleeping, and seeking pleasure without moral or spiritual progress becomes corrupt and distant from Allah’s mercy.

Many people grow old in age but remain immature in wisdom and character because they ignore the divine guidance found in the Qur’an, the teachings of the Prophets, and the wisdom of the Imams.
They may gain wealth and status, but if they lack morality and faith, they are at a great loss.

Imam Musa al-Kazim (A.S.) said:

“He who finds his two days equal is at a loss; he whose second day is worse is cursed; and he who does not improve himself with time, death is better for him.” (17)

Imam Ja’far al-Sadiq (A.S.) also narrated a similar saying. (18)

The Prophet (peace be upon him) said:

“The one who does business is loved by Allah.”

The best form of trade is to gain knowledge, good character, and spiritual strength. Such a person is truly successful.
Let us not waste our lives; let us strive to grow morally and spiritually, for on the Day of Judgment, only those whose scales are heavy with faith and good deeds will prosper.

Allah says in the Qur’an:

“Those whose scales are heavy (with good deeds) — they are the successful.
And those whose scales are light — they are the ones who have lost their souls, for they wronged Our signs.” (19–20)

The Path to Perfection

In the Qur’an, Allah encourages mankind to balance material and spiritual life. This is beautifully explained in Surah Aal-e-Imran:

“Beautified for people is the love of worldly things — women, children, gold, silver, fine horses, cattle, and fertile land. These are the pleasures of this worldly life, but with Allah is the best return.”

“Say, shall I tell you of what is better than all this? For those who are righteous are gardens beneath which rivers flow, pure spouses, and Allah’s pleasure. Allah is All-Seeing of His servants.”

“Those who say, ‘Our Lord, we have believed, so forgive us our sins and save us from the punishment of the Fire.’ Those who are patient, truthful, humble, charitable, and seek forgiveness before dawn.” (21)

The attraction between man and woman is natural and divinely created. Through marriage, love, and family life, humanity continues and society prospers.
However, when this relationship is guided by faith, piety, and morality, it leads to happiness in this world and eternal success in the Hereafter.